Tuesday, March 11 Tyler was looking really cute today with his spiky hair and baggy jeans. I walked by his locker twice today, thinking about the dance. I can’t get up the courage to ask him and I have this teeny tiny hope that maybe he’ll ask me so I keep smiling and waving at him and I know I’m such a dork. Omg. I’m thinking about Tyler the way I used to think about Mark! That is SO weird. I think he likes Rosie, though. They were talking in the hall and then after school. Jilly and I are supposed to go dress shopping for her this weekend. I don’t remember the last time I wore a dress. I’m not a big fan of them. They don’t look too good with Chuck’s. But if someone asked me to the dance, I might actually do the dress and shoe thing. Maybe. Monday, March 10 Of course Jilly got the lead in the spring play and now she’s freaking out about that along with going crazy about what to wear for the spring dance with Bus Boy. I’m trying to calm her down and not show how absolutely THRILLED I am that I’m NOT in the play! Yahoo. I didn’t even try out and that was totally cool with Jilly. Mrs. Babish did ask me if I’d create some computer and video backgrounds that could be projected on the back wall during some of the scenes and I was totally excited about that. So, I’m going to be at some of the rehearsals and also meet with her one-on-one to talk about what she wants. I had this weird thought that I might ask Tyler to the spring dance. Why would I do that? Sunday, March 9 We had a blast at Mr. F’s! Mrs. F is an amazing cook and so is Mr. F. He made this awesome salad with candied walnuts in it and the dressing was “a secret recipe” that he refused to share. I asked him if there was any Windex in it and he scowled. “Only the finest ingredients,” he said. I told my mom she had to find out how to make that dressing because I’d eat more salad if she did. We played Hearts after dinner and he and Mrs. F killed us. They are totally card sharks and I can’t believe we fell for their innocent faces. Chris and I decided we are going to practice at home so next time we can cream them. Dessert was chocolate mousse pie. Yum! Saturday, March 8 The movie was great! Nothing weird happened, which was good. Tyler sat between me & Mark but he only talked 2 me a couple of times cuz he was really in2 the movie & his big tub of popcorn. When the movie was over, we stayed cuz Rosie said we should watch the credits cuz all those other people worked on the movie too & deserved to be noticed. It actually turned out to be cool cuz @ the very end there was this little inside joke & an outtake that we never would have seen if we hadn’t stayed! All those people who left missed it. Ha! We are going over to Mr. F’s house tomorrow for dinner! I can’t believe it’s so soon after Mrs. F said something on Thurs but there u go. So I’ll get 2 c 4 myself if he’s got Tootsie Pops at home. Friday, March 7 Tyler sat with Rosie & me @ lunch but he was talking more 2 me than 2 her. Does he like me again? We were talking about maybe doing a computer camp this summer—there’s one at DU & probably other places. He kinda kept looking @ me while we talked. Rosie says he still likes me but since I don’t like him he’s trying 2 branch out but not getting 2 far. Maybe I should ask him 2 go 2 the spring dance. We could go as friends. I wonder if Mark will go with any1. He said that after everything w/ Jilly he kinda wanted to not do the girl thing so much. 2 bad cuz there r about a zillion girls who would love 2 go w/ him. It’s weird how you can b really good friends w/ a boy, but also sometimes wish it were more. I wonder if I will always have that w/ Mark—happy we r good friends & he talks 2 me about stuff b4 he talks 2 other people but also sometimes wondering what it would b like to be w/ him bfriend/gfriend. What would it feel like to hold his hand or even kiss him? Oh, God. This blog definitely CANNOT get out again. No way I could live w/ him knowing I’m wondering this stuff all over again. Bunch of us r going 2 a movie 2nite. Wonder who will sit where. Thursday, March 6 Mr. F said that he could put me to work this summer if I was interested. That could b pretty cool. I met his wife—aka Mrs. F—after I-Club today. She was there cuz Mr. F’s car was in the shop & he needed a ride. She was really nice…told me she thought it was great how I’d handled the BF, which was kinda embarrassing cuz that means Mr. F told her about it. Or maybe she found out some other way—the news sure got around. Anyway, she was super nice and invited me & the fam over 2 dinner. Didn’t say when but it was nice anyway. It’s kind of weird to think of Mr. F having a life outside of MBMS. I mean, obviously he lives in a house & stuff but I’ve only seen him @ school so I can’t picture him anywhere else. Things I’m Wondering About · Does Mr. F keep Tootsie Pops at his house? · Will he clean while we’re there? (I hope not) · Does Mrs. F tell him her problems & does he have good answers for her? · Will I get the answers to any of these questions? Doubtful. Tuesday, March 4 I think Tyler likes Rosie. He kept looking at her during I-Club. Either that or he’s trying to make me jealous because he told me he likes me to my face and I couldn’t say anything except: “Uhhhh.” He’s definitely nice and cute but I just don’t see him that way. But I have to admit I like having someone like me. Is that totally rude? Jilly said she and Bus Boy held hands on the bus today. I’m kind of glad I wasn’t there since I had I-Club. There really isn’t anyone I want to be holding hands with right now (I don’t think) but seeing them holding hands would remind me I don’t have a hand to hold which kind of stinks. Questions About the Art of Holding Hands · Do you just sit there holding hands? · Is it hand-to-hand or fingers interwined? · How do you decide how to hold hands? Do people just know? · Who’s hand would be on top and whose underneath? How do you decide this??? · Do you squeeze occasionally to make sure the other person still knows you’re holding hands? · Is it okay to squeeze if your hand falls asleep? · What if you have a total sweat attack? Hand-holding could get pretty complicated. It’s probably a good thing I don’t have a hand to hold. Sunday, March 2 Jilly and I went to the mall today. Dress shopping for the Spring Dance. She's all excited about Bus Boy. He leaves notes in her locker that say Wassup? or CUL8R and she goes crazy over them. Whatever. She found three that she liked. My fav was the blue one that has a cute V-neck and kinda swishes when she walks. I think it's her fav too but her said to put it on layaway and think about it since it was the first one she saw. Jamball doesn't start until April but we'll start practicing next month. I've convinced Rosie to try out on my team because we could use her. Mark called about homework. It was nice to talk, even if it was only about math. Saturday, March 1 So today Chris and I went to the Y and Tyler was there with Mark. Tyler was acting really goofy -- just making jokes and hardly looking at me or saying anything. I think he's finally over me, if he ever liked me in the first place. Kinda bummed me out, which I know is stupid since I don't like him that way. I guess it's like I've said before (and will probably say again)--it's nice to have someone like you, even if you don't like them back. Chris and I challenged them 2on2. After Chris and I CREAMED them in 2 games and Chris kinda saw where everyone was skill-wise, he asked Tyler to be on his team. Mark and I won 2 and lost 1--Chris just has a huge height advantage, even with Tyler the not so good basketball player. But it was SO fun--Mark and I kept laughing when we missed a pass and slapping high fives. I had little tingles in my hand when we touched but I think it was from slapping, not from anything else.

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